Tuesday, September 4, 2007

Winner, winner, chicken dinner???

Here's the deal...we at SECP really thought our quest to find the perfect Pooner might take awhile. 2, 3, 10, 20 years - you know, a pretty involved process. Well, since SECP's release to the entire galaxy just 8 short days ago, this gem found its way to our mailbox (take your eyeballs back to the image just to your left that you stared at for the past 5 minutes before reading this crap).

Is it over? Do we need to go ahead and just shut 'er down? Have we found the Perfect Pooner? Let's examine: we have big the designer sunglass - check, the long bleach blonde hair - check, earrings each weighing more than a slab crappie - check, the plunging neckline - check, tic-tac smuggling through the team colored dress - check, 8" orange guava bolster - check, team pom-pon - check, and finally the look of "ho-hum" on the pooner's face as Brandon Cox hangs another 100 on the Tide - check plus.

This is a democracy so we will put it in the hands of our already faithful SECP followers...weigh in on the comments section if you think we need our heads examined - it's entirely possible whether it's related to this posting or not.

Have YOU have found the perfect pooner? Send it to us: secpoon@gmail.com.

16 comments:

GovtMule said...

Great site, and a worthy nominee....bonus points for tic-tacs. However, the season is early and the poon will be be plentiful....let's give it time.

Grade a quality poon.

Anonymous said...

The quest is over. period.

Justin C. Cliburn said...

She meets all requirements for the perfect pooner, but she just lacks "it". She doesn't excite me. I think we can (and will) find better. Carry on, Poon Prospector; booty awaits.

country roads said...

Oh, it's too early to quit yet...besides, these posts are a bright spot in my day. I think you should carry on all season and then have a vote for #1 at the end of the season.

Anonymous said...

Although I'm an Auburn alum, she is hotter than hell but looks as if she sweats, bitch. IOW she'd be good for a sport pooning but eventually you'd have to trade her in.

Anonymous said...

Perfect SEC poon cannot come from UF. The hell with that. You need to add another criteria to your quest for perfection- the classic southern drawl. Some girls just look like everything they say will sound sweet. This girl doesn't have that- too much "bleach blonde from Jersey" in her.

Mike said...

minus points on no tote bag

Colonel said...

wowzy wow wow. She'll be hard to beat but keep up the searchfor perfection

Anonymous said...

Nice, but not perfect. It's hard to describe, but I know it when I see it!

Anonymous said...

Perfect? No. Quality? Yes. Continue the search, and pass on the findings to the faithful.

Anonymous said...

A Dothan Alabama Peanut Poon. By far the strongest yet.

Anonymous said...

she's also missing most of her left arm

Anonymous said...

personally i think the SC girl in the previous post is hotter

Anonymous said...

not quite perfect as you say

Anonymous said...

Damn those are big hips. She could give birth to Shaq fully matured.

Carolina girl should have stopped the search.

Anonymous said...

Nah, can't go there, oh Poontang One of Note. While she may be a perfect 9.1416, consider: neckline is not quite plungy enough; is that a nip or a designer bra construction flaw I see? That SEC ever-present slightly booze encouraged smile is lacking....should I continue. Keep looking oh brother, and you shall find....

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